These Days

These days
I'm going on
& on
Numb
like the
perfect drone

Swollen eye lids
watching the world
pass me by

Sleep
Eat
Work
Sleep

My baby asks me
"Mommy can we play?"
I go through the motions
allowing the childish notions

My car begs me
"Fill me with oil"
Blasted
Never ending toil

My family asks me
"What's wrong with you?"
As I sit and
silently stew

My heart asks me
"When are you gonna stop worrying?"
mitral flap fluttering
slow doubt flurrying

Slow motion run
Slower than normal
reach for my six-shooting gun
Fingers clutching
Fingerprints remember touching
Dimmest light
in the black
moonless
night
A spark of hope
Enough for me to cope