Get a Handle On Her

That's what they said
After she cried
The old man running
In shame
His inappropriate touch

I listened to her
Relay the memory
So casually
She rarely talks about
It
Dissociating
All over again
She even laughed

Later she lashed out
I bit my tongue
So many things
Taken the wrong way
When words are
Spoken in haste

Now I understand her
Something I
Tried to do
All my life
Leading up to
This point

Her underlying
Perception
She did something
Wrong
Saying things like
"I should've known
I should've ran home."

Now the darkness
Creeps in
At unexpected times
As her mind relaxes
Losing its train of thought

*This was the hardest to write but the verses demanded to be written.  Raw.  My mother was "nearly...not quite" molested when she was in grade school by a friend of her family.  Her family did the right thing and that person was never allowed near her again.  Authorities and laws and how things such as this were so undeniably grossly mistreated in her time. 1950's.  Something like this "never" happened during that time.  Her father was the mayor of their small town.  Now I understand her.  Now it's so much easier for me to be patient with her.  Her pain in watching me with my struggles may very well be the trigger point in her memory of this event in her life.  Her healing was never allowed to be complete.  Now I understand her.