It's All In Your Head

     It isn't just about surviving; it's also about healing.  One must make a conscious effort to heal.  We control every aspect of our own healing - our thoughts during that time can either damage us or strengthen us.  The mind is such a powerful entity.  Thoughts can be controlled and systematic or uncontrolled and erratic.  Paranoia, fear, anxiety,, and anger are all normal phases during the first steps of healing.  The best advice I was ever given during my precarious start of healing was simply, "Keep moving forward."
     So now I'm going to paint you a picture.  Imagine you're in a sess-pool .  Whether you were thrown into it or you accidentally fell in, doesn't matter.  You're in it and you want out as quickly as possible.  The filth and the grime of that sess-pool are overwhelming and just plain nasty.  You're not going to swim in it and languidly perform relaxing backstrokes.  Your whole focus is keeping your head above the filth and grime.  To get out of that sess-pool, though, you do have to swim through it.  If you keep moving forward with your focus on reaching the shore and stepping out to feel clean again, you will move through it quicker.
     Listen, we will always remember a trauma or bad past.  There's really no escaping it completely - except to forget the thoughts that further damage us.  Forgetting parts of the trauma is integral and crucial to healing.  Don't attempt to dredge up that which your mind is so willing to forget - unless you want to jump into the sess-pool of dark thoughts.
     What helps me stay out of my own nasty sess-pool?  I focus on 5 positive thoughts as soon as I wake up and another 5 positive thoughts right before I fall asleep.  I count my blessings before falling asleep; far more effective than simply counting sheep.  It's my daily mind sweep and I practice it throughout my day, as well, to better manage my healing. 
     Universal Law of Attraction and quantum physics delve deeper into the power of the mind.  To me, my mind is like a toddler.  It loves learning.  That learning can either be a bad / negative lesson or good / positive lesson.  I'm teaching and forming it to be better equipped for all of my life's situations.   It will inevitably become fixated on a negative thought - my job is to distract it back to a happy, simpler thought.  The sooner I distract my mind away from the negative, the sooner I start feeling better.  It's just that simple and just that hard.  I have to constantly remain consciously aware of the path my thoughts are headed.  If worrying and anxiety will not help me reach a positive means to any of my goals, then I take the worry and anxiety out.  I write.  I meditate.  I nap.  I say a positive mantra.  I look in the mirror and literally tell myself all the positive things I can think of.  Positive self-talk has been more than helpful; it keeps me moving forward.  Swimming in my sess-pool was no fun and I do not want to willingly or accidentally stumble in it again.